Week 16 [and kinda 14 & 15]...

It is the last night of Week 16 and I just had to get a picture in. My belly is always bigger at the end of the night so I took this one before I stuffed my face like the inner fat girl I have always been, that I am sure will make her debut sooner than later! My belly is a lot bigger than these pictures at this very moment, but it's my food baby on top of our Miracle Baby...I think! :)

Growing Baby Bump! Don't mind my messy haven of a closet-
it's been a rough week but it's still my favorite part of my house!

Things in the Montgomery household have been so hectic these last few weeks. On August 1st we arrived in Tucson, AZ to prep for Geoff's big surgery. We knew it would be a big surgery but never realized how huge it really would end up being. He had many unforeseen complications (the biggest tumor being a lot bigger than expected -the size of a lemon; about 6 more smaller tumors than originally expected; his right kidney was removed because after removing the tumors from it, there wasn't anything functional left; and his inferior vena cava (right aorta) was also affected and was removed & reconstructed- out of a material like raincoat material!! Insane! 81 staples, a chest hole to drain liquid from his lung & chest cavity, and 10 days later.... we were finally home. What went on in the hospital is beyond explanation. Sooo many complications arose that are simply too long to list- from transfusions, no food or liquids for 8 days, catheters, sitting/walking for the first time, etc...the list is endless. Once we arrived home, I was behind work one week and going back in 2 days.

Tomorrow is finally Friday of the first week of school and it has been the longest week ever. I am beyond exhausted and I feel lonely at times. We both haven't had a full night's sleep in 17 nights and counting and it is definitely taking its toll. One of the things that has been completely overshadowed by all of this is our Baby Miracle...it brings tears to my eyes that this beautiful experience is passing us by without us being able to take it in the way it deserves. Geoff said that this baby is learning to be tough like us, early on! As much as I agree, there's this protective side of me that thinks that our baby shouldn't have to be tough yet...In all honesty, although my heart is absolutely in this baby, my mind only revolves around Geoff. I know that all of this will pass soon and we will be celebrating our two-time Cancer Survivor (did I mention our discharge diagnosis read "Residual Testicular Cancer"- scary)! He unfortunately, got an infection in his incision and chest hole site and our follow-up appointment was moved up to this upcoming Tuesday. We are hoping the staples will come out then and we will be told we do not need chemotherapy.

I have missed pictures of our baby bump and contemplated taking them in the hospital (where we celebrated Weeks 14 and 15) but I just wasn't there mentally & emotionally...the second day we were there, I started cramping incessantly and had to call my midwife. It was kinda scary. I ended up being exhausted and dehydrated from the trip. Thank goodness!

Our Miracle Baby Montgomery keeps growing and appears to super HEALTHY!

I still kinda have the little lines for my upper abs and the lines down the side!
 I can see my pink/purple Cancer ribbon for Geoff, Vero & Bridget? Love my heroes.

How far along? 16 weeks, 6 days! I cannot believe we are three weeks away from being halfway done. I have a feeling I will finally look pregnant around then! At least I hope so. I have a bad obsession with looking up bellies that are as far along as me; 80% of them are bigger. I don't mind but I am also looking forward to looking pregnant so that I can feel and celebrate this pregnancy like it deserves. :)

Weight gain: About 5 lbs. 

Sleep: 17 nights and counting of no solid sleep- SO looking forward to this weekend. I have work early this Saturday but hey, I have to workout anyway! I have had two 12-13 hour days this week at work (out of the four I've worked this week) and it has been so draining!

Best moment this week: Nothing baby related this week :( BUT Baby's Daddy is improving tremendously despite his infection!! He is walking on his own- quite fast, going up and down the stairs a little bit, and even got to go on a car ride to the bank today! Conversations exhaust him, as well as sitting up for a long time but it is all part of his healing...Hope he's ready for our Tuesday roadtrip!

One of the best moments while in the hospital though, that I think we forgot about 5 minutes later (so sad) was that I FINALLY got the results from our early genetic testing and our baby appears to be HEALTHY as can be!!!!!!!!!!!! This has been a huge, amazing relief for us and our doctors because they are having us undergo more testing than normal to make sure due to all of Geoff's chemo. Now that this initial test back with such great results, I don't think I want to take anymore. Our baby is ours and we will deal with whatever comes our way as it comes...I think...

Another thing that has been amazing this week is anytime I get everyday texts, voicemails, etc. from our bestests'. I have been a bad friend and not calling anyone for so long (although, I will text a lot- just not ready to talk-talk). Yet, the girls I talk to every single day normally, my baby sis, B and Roomie call and leave their awesome voicemails, texts and messages. They are being so patient with me and I am so appreciative. I also received the sweetest snail mail package from Roomie, I have to take pictures of it this weekend to show it off! Bre and Aaron dropped off an amazing dinner/dessert, Becca and the kids dropped off an amazing thought-out care package, Geoff's mom brought us Chile Pepper, and tonight Vero dropped off healthy quinoa! I cannot explain how helpful and touching this has been! It really makes me feel less alone and supported through this tedious process. I think everyone is trying to give us our space and let us be, but it has gotten really lonely around here. Last time we went through this, everyone was always around so it felt so good. But this time with his surgery being so huge, not being ready for visits, etc., it's been harder.

Miss anything?: Honestly, right now, I'd do anything for a bottle of wine...with my LC and I's cream cheese/pesto with Wheat Things and organic carrots, lol! All the bottles of wine in my house are haunting me and it seems like something that would make me feel better! Sad but true, haha!

Movement: I read that between now and Week 20, mommies may start to feel it!

Food cravings: Oh goodness, my inner-fat girl has been in full effect lately! I am so grateful that I still have the energy (most days) to workout hard although I am POSITIVE I am taking in more junk calories/fat than I am burning. While at the hospital, I BodyRocked every other day and ran one HIIT mile. Eating was hard because I would usually be hours later than I should have been eating and the selection was terribly limited. 

Now that we're home, I eat SUPER healthy all day long- but once I get home it's been a different story. My portions have always been out of control and I am a known binge eater- always have eaten more than Geoff. On our first date ever, we went to In n Out. I ate my double-double...then finished off his! haha! So that's no surprise. 

But I have been "allowing" myself to have the junk that for years I have deprived myself of. Pizza from Round Table is my faave, ranch dressing, wings, Chile Pepper, fast food (even started saving the coupons that for years I would immediately throw away), etc. And since our household has been upside down lately, it has been SO hard to even think about making dinner. On the night's that I have gotten home before 8pm, I am starving and just want something quick. Geoff's mom dropped off Chile Pepper last night and I had it for a late dinner and leftovers for tonight's. The only time I had a healthy meal was when our Bre brought us delicious healthy homemade food. Her husband made us a dozen huge chocolate chip with walnut cookies (my favorite) and I have had SEVEN of them this week! Ridiculous! Not to mention we have ice cream in the freezer and the last three nights I have made sure to have some (ice cream sandwiches)! Ugh, I need to find the energy and time for homemade healthful meals like I always have! In our typical lives, I eat super duper healthy every single day and then allow myself to splurge on the weekends. It feels like these roles of food have switched. Is this normal? Ugh, and unfortunately, my metabolism has slowed down so much :(

Anything making you queasy or sick?: My heart is sick. :( But luckily, I have been feeling fine although I had a HUGE headache for a week. 

Gender: I wish I could say so I could start celebrating and purchasing items and getting the nursery ready. Geoff really wants to be active and alert when we do and I am being patient until then. Never in a million years did I think I'd be THIS patient but I am perfectly okay with waiting since him getting better is my #1 priority right now. But I can't wait til this Baby is #1---and I can refer to it as its gender! 

Labor signs: Not yet :) 

Symptoms: Just growing!

Belly button in or out?: Still innie. I have been wearing looser shirts that I purchased for back to school. All my clothes has always been skin tight and I didn't want my students to think I had gotten fat over the summer, haha. So I figured I'd wait to confirm anything until I am obviously showing (hoping it'll be by the 5th month). Anyway, due to the longer shirts, I don't know when it'll be time to change my belly button ring to the flexible one, lol! I am digging these looser shirts though because they're pretty and in style right now- you know, those button up chiffon-like tops? 

Wedding rings on or off?: on and loose this week. Weird!

Happy or Moody most of the time?: Eek. Grateful for my husband still being by our side...Grateful for our friends, family, and people who do not even know us who are praying for him day in and day out...Grateful for all this love.

But sad. & exhausted.

So I'll go with moody, haha!

Looking forward to: My two babies being healthy! <3